The Anna Nikstad Chronicles: To the Greatest Man in the World

Cheers to the greatest Man in the world.

Some people are born great, some have greatness bestowed upon them. My father, is one of those “born great” people that does more great. He stands nearly 7ft tall, built with blue twisted steel and has a voice that sounds like thunder. If he would mispronounce your name, you would feel compelled to change it. His hands big and grizzly, have held a mans life in the clenches of his fist and the other has cradled the most small and delicate. If he were to pat you on the back, you would feel compelled to list it on your resume. He is such a mighty force that anything he purchases increases it’s price in value. Even when he holds my mom's purse, he still looks manly. He is, the most interesting man in the world.

He is an international man of mystery, traveling to all corners of the world straightening out business with his uncanny wit and diplomatic wisdom. His business cards only say, “I’ll call you”. When he travels, his passport requires no photograph. When he goes to Spain, he chases the bulls. After he visits a new country, they name a sandwich named after him. In fact, he is even considered a national treasure to countries he’s never even been to. He has man leather bound books and his aroma is that of rich Mahogany. He is fluent in many languages and can speak mandarin…. in Spanish. Even though he is a world class traveler, he still makes it back home just in time for a dance recital. No matter how far away I am, he is only 20 mins away.

Hercules is like my dad. Superman owns a pair of pajamas with my dad’s face on it. He’s one of those guys you always want on your side. He once brought a knife to a gunfight.. just to even the odds. He can bowl a perfect game throwing overhand. He’s never lost a game of chance and he ran a triathlon because it was “on the way”. He would do anything for his family. Spending days on the lake with him, you were always safe because he could suck the lake dry if you needed him to. Once he went for a dip in the ocean… sharks now have a week dedicated to him. No man or animal would ever challenge him as he could easily snatch them up by the collar and the belt and toss them wherever he wanted. While defending me from a horse bite, he punched the horse in the face, its descendants are now known as the giraffe.

My dad has this incredible way of defying nature. He doesn’t do anything half-assed, when I was a kid he built me a treehouse that had a fully furnished basement. We went camping and I once saw him start a fire using only dental floss and water. A tree fell in a forest and no one was there but he still heard it. He doesn’t need insect repellant because mosquitoes refuse to bite him purely out of respect. He has never walked into a spider web because they make sure to stay out of his way. He has taught many old dogs a variety of new tricks. He even taught a German shepherd how to bark in French. Bigfoot saw him in the forest and tried to get a picture of him, Bigfoot was never seen again.

Everyday life is a breeze for a man of such stature. If opportunity knocks on his door and he’s not home, opportunity waits. He lives vicariously through himself. He has done so many great things that he has received the lifetime achievement award, twice. He is my greatest strength and brightest light in my life. My dad truly is the most interesting man in the world.

Happy Fathers Day!!

With love, from Anna 💕